The Day We Finally Got Answers: My Son's ADHD Diagnosis and Our Decision About Medication
After seven years of questions, my son was officially diagnosed with ADHD. In this post, I share our journey to diagnosis, my own experience growing up with ADHD, and the emotional decision our family faced when considering medication. If you're navigating a recent diagnosis or wondering what comes next, I hope our story reminds you that you're not alone.
Steffani Baty
6/11/20264 min read
Today, I received news that I have been waiting seven years to hear: my son has officially been diagnosed with ADHD.
I know that might sound ridiculous when I say I suspected it all the way back when he was one year old, but maybe it was just my mom intuition. From a very young age, he had trouble listening, struggled with social interactions, and was incredibly hyperactive. As he got older, those symptoms became more noticeable. I would bring up my concerns to pediatricians, and they would often tell me to be patient because he could grow out of it. While that is true for many children, I just had a feeling there was something more going on.
When I was 11 years old, I had many of the same struggles. I had difficulty focusing, staying organized, and navigating social situations. My parents took me to a therapist who later referred me to a psychiatrist, where I was diagnosed with ADD (now commonly referred to as ADHD).
Looking back, I feel incredibly grateful for the support I received. In the early 2000s, many young girls were overlooked when it came to ADHD diagnoses because the symptoms often looked different than they did in boys. Fortunately, I had a great team that recognized what was going on and jumped into treatment right away.
I was prescribed Ritalin, and honestly, my world seemed to change overnight. For the first time, I could focus on my homework and complete tasks without feeling completely overwhelmed. I remember feeling emotional because I finally found relief.
As I got older, I received accommodations in school. At the time, I was embarrassed by them. I didn't want to feel different from everyone else because, honestly, I didn't feel different. It wasn't until years later, watching my own son struggle with ADHD, that I began to heal some of those feelings surrounding my own diagnosis.
To this day, I still believe ADHD is one of my superpowers. It helped shape who I am. When I found something I truly loved, English, I locked in and excelled. That passion and ability to hyperfocus helped me graduate from UCLA with honors.
Seeing the Strengths in ADHD
Over the years, I've had a lot of conversations with my son about focus, friendships, and some of the challenges that come with ADHD. But I've also made it a point to talk about the strengths.
I always remind him that ADHD isn't all bad.
When you find a special interest, you dive in headfirst and learn everything you can about it. You often have a fun, adventurous personality because you're constantly looking for excitement and new experiences. Sometimes you say impulsive things that are absolutely hilarious. You tend to be creative, energetic, and full of ideas.
There are a lot of negative things said about ADHD, but in reality, there is something pretty special about the way ADHD brains work. Yes, there are challenges, but there are also so many strengths that deserve to be celebrated.
The Medication Decision
When my son was officially diagnosed, I wasn't surprised. More than anything, I felt validated. After years of wondering and advocating for him, we finally had answers. An official diagnosis opens doors to support, accommodations, and services that can help children succeed. Early intervention is incredibly important, and I was grateful we finally had a clearer path forward.
During the appointment, my son's pediatrician also prescribed a stimulant medication. This is where my mind started running wild. As I mentioned earlier, I was prescribed medication as a child, and I have never been against using medication when symptoms are significantly affecting someone's daily life. I know firsthand how helpful it can be.
But making that decision for your child feels very different. I was really on the fence about putting my small child on a stimulant. These medications are powerful and shouldn't be taken lightly. There are side effects to consider, and as a parent, that's scary. I spent a lot of time thinking about it, researching, and reflecting on my own experiences. At the end of the day, I kept coming back to one thought: I wanted my son to feel some relief from his struggles.
I want him to be able to focus in school. I want him to feel successful instead of frustrated. I want him to build stronger relationships with peers and feel more confident navigating everyday life. For our family, the potential benefits outweighed the risks. That doesn't mean the decision was easy.
In fact, his first day taking medication will be while he's at school, and that makes me nervous. Part of me wishes I could be right there with him to monitor how he's feeling and make sure everything goes smoothly. To help ease my anxiety, I reached out to his teacher and school staff. I let them know he would be starting a new medication and might be feeling different throughout the day. Knowing that his teacher is aware and supportive has helped put my mind at ease. I've been in close communication with the school, and I know they will help keep an eye on him.
For Parents Walking a Similar Path
That's the thing about getting a diagnosis, it isn't always easy, even when it provides answers. A diagnosis can bring relief, validation, hope, fear, and a hundred other emotions all at once.
While medication was the right choice for our family, it may not be the right choice for yours, and that is perfectly okay. Every child is different. Some families find success with medication, while others choose therapy, accommodations, behavioral strategies, or a combination of approaches.
At the end of the day, we know our children best. My biggest piece of advice is to give yourself time. Take a deep breath and absorb the information. Do your research. Ask questions. Talk with your child's doctor, your partner, trusted family members, or other parents who have been through it. Most importantly, trust yourself. You know your child better than anyone else.
And if you're currently walking this road, I want you to know that you're not alone. Parenting can feel overwhelming sometimes, especially when you're trying to make big decisions for someone you love so deeply. We're all doing our best. We're all learning as we go. And we're all just trying to help our children thrive.